How to stop being a perfectionist

Many men fall into the trap of perfection, especially in their career and romantic relationships. Today’s guest has found that the path of perfection is B.S. The more he brings his vulnerable truth, the more successful he’s become.

Show notes

Many men come to me in pain, wrestling with ideas about how they’re supposed to be. 

They tell me they are not living up to these ideas and think this is the cause of having less success or loving relationships.

Men tell me they think they should be strong, powerful, competent, productive, assertive…all the stereotypical qualities they’ve heard will make them a better man! 

Today’s Man Alive podcast guest is a man who discovered, to put it bluntly, that those ideas are a bunch of B.S.!

Sam McAfee is a 20 year veteran of Silicon Valley developing better technology leaders, high-performing product development teams, and strengthening organizations. He has worked with well-known companies including Adobe, Teach for America, Anthem, PG&E and Blackstone!

Over his career he has realized that the more vulnerable and transparent he has become, the more impactful his work is and the easier it goes!

The idea that you could somehow be perfect, or that competence and confidence is your path to success or happiness — these are myths.  

In this Man Alive conversation we discussed what can take the place of these myths, as well as:

As someone who has worked in tech for 20 years, Sam affirms the need for connection and putting people first, even in business. You’ll find more freedom for yourself as you hear his personal stories and struggles. 

Links:

StartUp Patterns

For Men:  3 Ways Men Lose Influence at Work and With Women

For Women: Modern dating doesn’t have to be a nightmare for women

Bio:

Sam develops better technology leaders, build high-performing product development teams, and strengthen their organizations.

As a Silicon Valley veteran of 20 years, h has helped many companies build and scale new digital products, find product-market fit, and build and improve product development capabilities. I work with product executives and teams to build strong leadership and execution skills, through a focus mindfulness, autonomy, and social impact.

I’ve worked with companies large and small, including Adobe, Sharethrough, Teach for America, Anthem, PG&E, Blackstone, Credit Sesame and many others. I wrote the book, Startup Patterns, and I’m a regular speaker at product and engineering events around the US.

At work or in the community, I am committed to making the world a better and more livable place for all people. I have many years of experience as a community activist, and I am particularly interested in the intersection of open source and community organizing.


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