Most men are taught to wear masks from a young age, to prove their worth through a societal construct of “manliness.” These days we can see the pain and isolation this has caused men. Today’s guest shows you how to break down these constructs to reclaim yourself and your life.
Show notes
Men are taught from a young age what it is to be “manly.” You likely don’t remember the first time you were guided to suck it up or hold it in, because boy and girl babies are often treated and raised differently. Before you learned to speak, you may have known that “boys don’t cry,” or that you would get more love or respect if you showed strength rather than fear.
Today’s Man Alive podcast guest has worked with more than 300 organizations, talking about authentic masculinity, equity, allyship, leadership and sexual violence prevention. He understands men and the masks they wear, and has been on his own journey of Unmasking. He is the author of the upcoming book, Unmasking: Toward Authentic Masculinity.
In our rich and important podcast conversation we discussed:
- Society’s demands and how men are taught to wear masks
- The process of “Unmasking” and breaking free from external expectations
- How we silence boy babies and young boys
- How to step into integrity and authenticity in a world that doesn’t always support it
- How to come to know your true identity and integrate this into your life
Keith is an inspiring example of a man who is a strong and powerful leader, who also integrates his more vulnerable side into his life and work. When you’re done with this one, check out another great episode on waking up out of mechanical masculinity, and the liberating power of compassion and connection for men.
Links:
Connect with Keith
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Website: shanajamescoaching.com/3ways
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Bio:
Keith is a speaker, a consultant, a coach, and the author of the bestselling book, Unmasking: Toward Authentic Masculinity.
Keith is the author of Unmasking: Toward Authentic Masculinity and has consulted with 300+ organizations and written over 25 articles and book chapters. He is a certified coach with 1,000+ hours of coaching college presidents, corporate and nonprofit leaders, and independent scholars and activists. He co-authored The Curricular Approach to Student Affairs and coedited Addressing Sexual Violence in Higher Education. His TEDx Talk on preventing sexual violence has been viewed around the world.
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It’s very interesting that the metaphors of “mask” and “taking off the mask”, and simple questions about them, are able to easily elicit insights into the impediments to men having the lives they want, and the process of moving towards that.
It’s also interesting how the “true self” under the mask is both obvious and mysterious, evolves over time, and may even be somewhat dependent on the situation and to whom you are relating.